Did you know that some of the biggest empires, including America, were founded on the basis of wanting better food? It’s true if you read your history correctly you will see that spices were a big part of trade, exploration and wealth. Although I am sure that some religious persecutions and some other factors played a role. You would have thought though by present would have figured out the difference between food and objects that are edible, but shouldn’t be ate.

CatFish:
First lets discuss the good ole southern food-catfish. Do you know what Catfish is? It’s a bottom feeder. That means it eats other fishes poop. So next time you go out and you see catfish on the menu, just remember that fish eats shit, your eating the fish, your eating the shit. Why would you put that in your mouth, even if it is cooked?

Escargot:
Escargot is fancy for SNAILS. Originating from France, tells you right there its bad, snails are considered a delicacy among rich people. If you are rich you think you could afford something better than snails. They are slippery, slimy, and can you imagine the texture they must have. A bunch of rich people in a room eating snails, how fuckin odd is that?

Sushi:
Raw fish? Yep, that’s a question. Fish were meant to be cooked. That’s why some hairy inbreed cave man invented fire. So he could cook some food over a campfire and ignore his nagging woman. So if people are eating RAW fish, it seems like we are moving backwards with times. Let’s see it started off, raw food? invention of fire?cooked food then back to raw food? What the hell, that doesn’t make sense. Once again too, the texture on this uncooked food is absolutely horrid.

Raw Monkey Brains:
In Asia, raw monkey brains are considered a delicacy. Who would have even thought to eat a monkey’s brain? That’s not right. Did they think, “Oh if I eat a monkey’s brain I will get smarter or it will taste just marvelous?” Also thanks to whomever this dumbass was who wanted to eat this, this is where researchers think the virus – HIV might have been the first case origin to a human. So let me get this strait, you can eat monkey’s brain and have a chance to get HIV. I would rather have needs stuck in the ends of my toes then to eat something disgusting and have a chance of a slow death.

Now all these are my opinions of course, so if you’re a fan of one of these foods, I don’t care if you take it offensively. This is my article, if you disagree with any of my opinions, go write one yourself. You thought I was going to apologize huh?

As Always Keep It Real,
Chris Ruesink
InkByChris.com